Recently a young man that is close/related to many of my Facebook friends decided to take his own life, which has led to many statements about the lack of support within the black community, particularly in regard to mental illness and general life struggles. This response is somewhat a natural one because it is very human to seek to distance oneself from imbalance or malady. Conversely, the advancement of society has fostered the understanding that afflicted persons are valuable and should be remedied rather than shunned. However, as a member of the black community I have noticed a propensity to cling to (or be attributed) the strong archetype, which is coupled with rejection, negligence, and gaslighting if one persists in speaking otherwise. This archetype is traumatic, leads to maladaptive behaviors and responses, and is damaging to the point of costing lives.
The false narrative of black strength began in slavery as a justification for misuse, over work, and neglect. Subsequently one can posit that the internalized understanding that blackness will be subjugated to whiteness and in fact blackness is unlikely to be valued or cared for unless it somehow negatively impacted whiteness. In short, the privations that blacks dealt with would be ignored and justified as self-inflicted, while white affliction would be very dangerous for blacks unless offset as much as possible without any regard for personal cost to the blacks. Centuries of such conditioning can develop a mindset that teaches one to ignore one’s own pain and force oneself to function regardless of damage, lest conditions get worse because of inability to deliver.
Additionally, many black people were forcibly converted to Christianity, which preaches the one size fits all solution of Jesus. Hope was maintained through the scarcity of resources and lack of options by clinging to the belief that Jesus would heal all wounds if you believed enough and remained devoted to the faith. When the trial was overcome or even endured it became proof that “God is good,” and when relief did not come it was evidence that one was not as devoted as one should be, “the lord works in mysterious ways,” or heaven needed another angel. This mystical expectation led to a perspective that asking for any assistance besides Jesus was a demonstration of a lack of faith; proof that the afflicted was unwilling to completely trust their plight to Jesus as the only solution and therefore the lack of response is due to shortcomings within the individual. Furthermore, Christianity taught blacks that speaking out or questioning was disrespectful, therefore suffering in silence was encouraged.
During and after slavery, black people were in a position to be vulnerable to the actions of psychopathic predators. This vulnerability was exacerbated by the fact that blacks held little (if any) power, and therefore had few options for protection or defense. The responsibility for avoiding victimization was directed towards blacks, which manifested a hyper vigilance against displaying any weakness or vulnerability that would make one stand out as easy prey. Blacks learned to silently absorb abuse, reciting DuBois’ “We Wear the Masks,” while projecting feelings of inadequacy onto each other in hopes to find an acceptable means of conduct that will mean safety from the predator. Subsequently, distrust abounds within the community because the vulnerability that you expose to a supposed friend today can be weaponized to make you a victim tomorrow, or may even cause you to become cannibalized within the community by those seeking to improve their own social status by standing on the backs of others. Thus, we suffer in silence, afraid to expose our weaknesses because we don’t believe we will actually receive any help, at least not without strings.
This young man’s death brought awareness to a servius issue within the black community. Although we may share memes highlighting the issue, how many of us have truly stopped to think about our own actions, and how we contribute to the problematic cycle? For change to occur we have to get outside of our comfort zone, which means changing the toxic ways that we behave, which includes talking bad about each other when we are in need, ostracizing each other when we need community the most, and brushing off genuine please for help with gaslighting (you’re strong; you got this, etc.). Instead, be as helpful as you feel comfortable being, and apathetic if you are unable or unwilling to be part of the solution. Below, I have included a link to John Leland’s article on Dr. Carl L. Hart’s theory on substance abuse, which offers a fresh perspective on substance abuse and an interesting read. Please, let’s help each other make it through hard times; life is bad enough.
A version of this article appears in print on April 11, 2021, Section MB, Page 4 of the New York edition with the headline: A Neuroscientist Wages War on the War on Drugs.